The day I accepted Christ as my Lord and Savior was the day I had started to struggle with authenticity. I know what some of you are thinking. “Girl you’re supposed to know who you are when you accept Christ”! That was not the case with me. The more I tried to find myself the more I struggled with identity. It seems backwards right? You’re supposed to know who you are in Christ because he let us know who we are.
I am God’s workmanship, created in Christ unto good works (Ephesians 2:10).
But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light. (1 Peter 2:9)
There is a difference between reading these scriptures, knowing it and understanding it.
For a long time I didn’t know who I was. I knew that I was different from the people around me and I was uncomfortable with it. I decided that in order for people to accept me I had to be like them. So, I hung out with the wrong crowd constantly. From middle school until my junior year of college, I always found myself trying to figure out how I fit in with these group of people.
If you’re struggle with trying to figure out who you are don’t fret because I’ve been going through the motions of letting God work on me so I can find out who I am. So here’s what I’ve discovered so far.
- It’s okay to be different and stand out. God made us different from everyone else because he wants us to be an individual. So, if you don’t fit in with a group of people it’s okay. It’s good that you’re not like everyone else or you wouldn’t be you.
- Find out what makes you unique. Being unique is like number one, what are the things that make you unique? Is your fashion sense different from everyone else? What makes you, you?
- It’s okay to not follow the crowd but take the lead. Sometimes God places us in people lives to not be just another number but to take the lead. Sometimes he wants us to guide people and be an example.
- Be comfortable with who you are. It took me a while to understand that I have to be okay with me including my flaws! I look in the mirror sometimes and I think well my skin can be smoother. I know I need to go to the orthodontist and get this grill fixed! I have to stop myself sometimes and be like “Well it is what it is”! Sure we want to be flawless physically but I’ve learned that it’s really what counts on the inside. You can be drop dead gorgeous but if your insides are messed up then you won’t be happy or whole as a person.
- Continue to let God work on you. This is the hard part for me because for years I’ve been trying to grab the wheel when he’s the driver. He’s the captain of the ship. You’re just a squirrel in his world trying to get a nut! Just let go of the wheel and get into the passenger side. Stop trying to control everything and let him do it.
I’ve been called a weird, strange, different, goody two shoes, good girl all of those things that I thought was wrong. Instead, I just learned to embrace it. If they call you weird, so what? Goody two shoes, who cares? If they think you’re lame or whatever that means then obviously you have something that they don’t have. Hang in there and watch God work on you! Be great my friend!